Haute Dog Confessions: “Best in ShoE”

Conventional wisdom says that we canines chew shoes because the leather elicits memories of our time in the wild, long past eras when we teethed on the hide remnants of those lower down the food chain.  Today’s bourgeois pups, however, chew shoes, slippers, and socks with nary a whisper of leather about them, or any other natural product for that matter.  It’s likely that the scent message imparted to those objects by their owners’ feet serve as the more likely attractant in those people’s absence.  My sense, being a little more than above average, is that they are just bored out of their minds or bereft of good taste.  Lacking in style and personality, the commoners among my species will just chew on shoes without reflection on trends in luxury or status symbols.

My blog is to give voice to and represent the Haute Dogs among us, those that ‘get it,’ and those with enough taste to chew the very best.  The dogs that aren’t well, dogs.  We are the karmic mistakes, longing to actually wear and chew up Manolos, Louboutins, Ghesquierres, Jimmy Choos, and for the comfort-driven canine set, Taryn Roses.  In another incarnation, we might be Sarah Jessica Parker, Mary-Kate Olsen, Nicole Kidman, and other celebrity style-icons.  Instead, here I sit, literally deserving the term, “bitch!”

Last weekend, I reluctantly settled for the right shoe of a set of Tod’s heavy-stitched brown leather mules with a broadly set heel of matching stitchery.  They had been worn for at least a year and to hear the owner kvetch to my owners about her loss, you’d think she was wearing one of the above heavy-hitter designers on my list.  It was not my fashionista kind of crowd. All wore ‘sensible’ shoes, except the skinny Nebraska cowboy with sizzling hot boots. My mistress, master, and the ilk they invited don’t grasp nor possess the kind of fashion gene I inherited.

So, if you are devining my style wavelength, following my tail, please take the time to read the list below about the most expensive shoes ever offered on high street. Then, shimmy up to these top-of the-line toys and masticate all of these with gusto! (note to self: Stuart Weitzman deserves the title of “attention hog” for taking up more real estate on this list than all other best-in-shoe designers):

#10: Whatever shoes Donald Trump is wearing right now

#9: Diamond-Encrusted Custom Nikes

Price tag: $50,000

Purchased by Outkast’s Antwan “Big Boi” Patton

#8: Slippers Worn by Indian Prince Nizam Sikandar Jah of Hyderabad in the 18th century

Price tag: $160,000

These haven been stolen from the Bata Shoe Museum in Toronto, Canada.

#7: Stuart Weitzman’s “Diamond Dream” Stilettos

Price tag: $500,000

Anika Noni Rose, aka “the other one” in Dreamgirls, got her chance to shine at the Oscars in 2007 when she wore Stuart Weitzman’s “Diamond Dream” strappy sandals on the red carpet.

#6: Ruby Slippers from “The Wizard of Oz”

Price tag: $666,000

#5: Stuart Weitzman “Retro Rose” Pumps

Price tag: $1,000,000 Every year, fashion footwear king Stuart Weitzman picks a new and rising star, a “Hollywood Cinderella”, to wear his latest multi-million dollar shoes to the Oscars.

In 2008, he selected screenwriter Diablo Cody, author of “Juno,” to wear the $1M heels known as the “Retro Rose” down the Academy Awards red carpet.

Ms. Cody initially agreed to wear them but later backed out after critics questioned her “Indie”, anti-Hollywood cred for participating in a glamorous publicity stunt. She opted to wear an unnamed brand instead.

#4 Stuart Weitzman “Platinum Guild” Stilettos

Price tag: $1,090,000

Actress Laura Harring was the first Stuart Weitzman “Cinderella”. She was chosen by the shoe designer to wear the “Platinum Guild” diamond encrusted sandals to the 2002 Academy Awards.

Accompanied by three bodyguards, the shoes paled in comparison with the $27 million dollar necklace she also wore to the awards show.

#3 Stuart Weitzman “Ruby Slippers”

Price tag: $1,600,000

In 2003 Stuart Weitzman created the “Ruby Slippers” in anticipation of another breakthrough starlet wearing them to that year’s Academy Awards. His inspiration was the original ruby slippers worn by Judy Garland as Dorothy, otherwise known as #6 in our list.

However Mr. Weitzman ended up cancelling his shoe’s appearance. His spokesperson Jane Weitzman stated…”we pulled the ruby shoes we were planning to show off at the Oscars out of respect for those fighting in Iraq.”

#2: Stuart Weitzman Tanzanite Heels

Price tag: $2,000,000

The “Cinderella Slippers” were worn by singer Alison Krauss (nominated for best song for the film Cold Mountain) at the 2004 Oscars while walking the red carpet and performing onstage.

#1: Stuart Weitzman’s Rita Hayworth Heels

Price tag: $3,000,000

The shoes’ “centerpieces” are diamond and precious gemstone earrings from the estate of late 40’s movie siren Rita Hayworth, and now belong to Hayworth’s daughter, Princess Yasmin Aga Khan.